Dating advice for the black woman
He says he sings it to her every year, but usually not in person. Dear Carolyn: My husband is uncomfortable with our 20-year-old white son dating a black woman.When he asks why his feelings are wrong, what can I say besides, “Because they are”? Dear What: His view is immoral on its face to anyone who believes foremost that humans of all shapes, sizes and colors are of equal worth and deserve to be *reflexively* accepted and treated as such.But while most of my friends were telling me that my hair reminded them of Janet Jackson’s in , the guy I’d been seeing was bemused when he saw me in person with my waist-length new do. “I didn’t know your hair was…so long.” Let the record show that this dude is incredibly intelligent, but it was clear that black hair confused the hell out of him. I would never have to explain to a black dude that I was clearly wearing braided hair extensions! Here are 10 things you’ll only understand if you’re a black girl dating a white dude. You have to teach them everything about black hair. That moment when you stop being reluctant to talk about race issues because, get real, you’re not dating an ignorant jerk. Though Black men are still twice as likely as Black women to date outside their race, it seems more and more of us are becoming open to dating beyond the color line.
Coming to terms with the fact that there are some things about being black that they will just never get, no matter how empathetic they are.
That’s the old I’m-not-a-racist-but-everyone-else-is dodge. I mean, you’ve had over 20 years with the guy; I find it hard to believe there’s been no indication this was coming.
At the same time, though, one’s own children and their choices can test our beliefs with a force that little else can. You have to do better than “because they are” if you want him to do better than “uncomfortable feelings.” Ask him how he’d feel if a woman’s parents saw your son as an inferior match for their daughter based on his skin color alone.
The immediate thought for many is, With all the gorgeous, accomplished Black women available, why didn't he choose one of us?
So it's no wonder we're thrilled for Black women who have found love—no matter the ethnicity of their partner.